Aaron Geer, Founding Editor & Contributor

Aaron Geer played in the NBA for seventeen years where he scored more points than Michael Jordan and Wilt Chamberlin, combined. He picked up the guitar with his good friend Pete Seger back in the day and wrote some anti-fascist songs that were eventually picked up by Simon Cowell. He invented the continent Australia and owns a large chain of restaurants in southeast Antarctica. Though he doesn’t like to swim, he can easily hold his breath as long as a big whale. He’s written about a gagillion books, most on prisoners (when he was in prison – don’t ask), rampant gambling in baseball (i.e. Little League), Yoruban femininity in Nigerian politics, grilled cheeses and potato chips, and himself. His autobiographical account of writing his autobiography, How I Managed It All : Sex, liquor and video games, is supposed to be out now but his agent really sucks and is on “vacation” in Bermuda (sure, like that’s a real place, like Idaho, or meerkats). When he’s not base jumping off really awesome stuff, he’s probably at some coffee shop reading or simply contemplating. Just joking, that shit’s for pussies.

Matt Hodges, Contributor

Matt Hodges worked as a acrobatic engineer for the fifth largest circus in West Michigan for six years before obtaining his goal by eating ten tacos from Taco Bell in under ten minutes. He doesn’t believe in zone coverage, but he’s been known to dye his hair bright blonde in order to make himself more allusive. He’s not quite sure why, but everyone thinks it works. In order to print pages for free, his closet is full of Kinko’s attire. He’s been caught every single time. He’s worked at Kinko’s for forty-six years and is the freelance illustrator for the television series Planet Earth. His works were sold for so much money in the 80s that it’s hard to count. At 23, he sold his collection of [copyright infringement case #3223, Gary, Indiana], and he’s never been the same since. He likes taffy, early Science Fiction, and still thinks he thought of the idea of Tom Hanks playing Forrest Gump before anyone else did.

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